1. |
Screaming At Traffic
03:55
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You’re a massive question mark
I think about when it gets dark
A sweet what if that never could have been
I didn’t think it worth the risk
But I should have shot my shot and missed
Instead of being scared to lose or win
My shoulders are learning to carry my burdens alone
But my hand wants a friend that it can hold to the end of the road
But I may as well be screaming at traffic
Day dreaming no it can’t fix
This weighing on me I can’t change what done
And the secret romantic in me just can’t get past this
I’m not saying that I wish you were the one
I’m just saying that I wish I’d had the guts
To see if it could have been love
Though we were never more than friends
I used to love to hold your hand
I knew it didn’t mean a thing to you
So I’d take a breath and hold it in
And not admit I felt a thing
Cause when you’re just a kid that’s what you do
My shoulders are hurting
From carrying my burdens alone
But my mind won’t let me share them
I’m just fine and I can bear them on my own
But I may as well be screaming at traffic
Day dreaming no it can’t fix
This weighing on me I can’t change what done
And the secret romantic in me just can’t get past this
I’m not saying that I wish you were the one
I’m just saying that I wish I’d had the guts
To see if it could have been love
To see if there could have been us
I’ve played it over in my head and I know how it would have went
You’d trade me in for someone new
I’d cut my hair and dye it blue
And write some songs to fit the mood
Maybe get a new tattoo
I think loving you
Could make my heart and break it too
But that’s not how the story goes
Things are different now we’ve grow
And truth be told that doors been closed for years
We grew apart, it happened slow
It’s been a long time since we spoke
And I don’t have the right to call you dear
So I’ll fight this lonely night and leave it here
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2. |
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I keep a pen and paper by my bed, for night like these
My brother gave me that idea, he over thinks like me
And I hope he knows he's not alone
I broke the off switch in my brain
Seems you and I we're both the same
And I guess we'll have to find a way
To live with pride and live with shame
It's hard to sleep, I know you try
You lay your head and close your eyes
I don't know much, but I know you're tired
So in the meantime
You can rest on me if you need too
I think this is the nicest song I've ever written to date
and I mean it
You can cry on me if you want too
Just like I've cried to you and you've always listened
I'm on your team no conditions
I said it, I mean it
I know lately life's been hard to take, though I can't read your mind
It's been hard to watch you saving face, and worse to see you cry
So I wrote this song to let it out, those things we say out loud
Like "you're too great to be so down" and I hope you know I'm proud to know you
I broke the off switch in my brain
Seems you and I we're both the same
And I guess we'll have to find a way
To live with pride and live with shame
It's hard to sleep, I know you try
You lay your head and close your eyes
I don't know much, but I know you're tired
So in the meantime
You can rest on me if you need too
I think this is the nicest song I've ever written to date and I mean it
You can cry on me if you want too
Just like I've cried to you and you've always listened
I'm on your team no conditions
I said it, I mean it
Ok let me know if you're starting to overflow,
let me know if its too much for you too hold
Its cliche, but day by day it's gonna be ok
I know it ends that way
Let me know if you need me to spell it out
I'll write it big, write it bold, double underline
I'm not playing, I'm just sayin' its going to be ok
I know it ends that way
I broke the off switch in my brain
Seems you and I we're both the same
And this is the nicest song I've ever written.
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3. |
Stitch It Up
04:09
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I look for poetry in everything
But lately I can’t find it
I get scared its fallen out with me
And I don’t know who’s behind it
My Rubik’s cube’s the only puzzle I can solve these days
So I solve it every morning just to help me feel I’m sane
I’ll write it in my worry journal
And hope it helps now the feelings more external
Can someone call the referee
Cause there’s a voice in here that screams at me
That I can never be enough
And I should shut my mouth and stitch it up
Yesterday I let her take the mic and stand at centre stage
It’s foul play and I can’t take it
She’s a pain that I can’t shake off
What a mess what a joke I’m admitting
What a cruel anecdote to be living
You can never win
Some days it would be nice to be seen
But maybe in different lighting
Just like the sugar in my tea
I’m way too good at hiding
I’ve been sleeping with the windows open just to feel the breeze
Cause it makes me feel like I’m not so broken
Puts my mind at ease
I’ll write it in my worry journal
And hope the feelings universal
Can someone call the referee
Cause there’s a voice in here that screams at me
That I can never be enough
And I should shut my mouth and stitch it up
Yesterday I let her take the mic and stand at centre stage
It’s foul play and I can’t take it
She’s a pain that I can’t shake off
What a mess what a joke I’m admitting
What a cruel anecdote to be living
What a mess what a joke I’m admitting
What a cruel anecdote to be living
You can never win
So throw it to the wind
Or you’ll never win
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4. |
Ice Cream In The Rain
03:13
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Always making plans
That was the man you used to be
A safe pair of hands
Always had an itinerary
The leaves turn golden swallows fly and I’ll come home again
But you won’t be the same
Will you know my face
I’ve been knocking on your door but you’re not there
And I wonder if you’re hiding how you’re scared
Maybe we can take a drive like we used to do
And we can get lost on the way
And we can eat ice cream in the rain
Not an open man
Shutters always half closed to me
I couldn’t understand
But there’s a lot I couldn’t see
The snow will fall I’ll wish I called more while I had the choice
Now there’s not much point
Will you know my voice
If you lose the words to speak up
Sing a song you like
No we don’t have to say much
We can just sit a while and smile cause you tried
You tried it all
And even if you can’t recall
You gave your all
As the daisies grow your memory goes
Now these moments passed are mine to hold
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Bea Stewart Belfast, UK
Born and raised just outside Belfast in Northern Ireland, Bea is a singer songwriter influenced by the Irish folk music she grew up around. Honest storytelling and vulnerability are at the core of her sentimental writing, in the hopes that hearing her process her messy thoughts around life will help you process yours. ... more
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